The Hymns and Carols of Christmas


Authorship Unknown

To the Tune of "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing"

Hark the Ninja Turtles sing
Kid-dy marketing is king.
Fun to watch, expertly styled
To manipulate my child.

Garfield, Bettlejuice 'n Tickle-me Elmo,
Ma I need it, 'every child wails
Care Bears, Super Mario
Brainwashed, but they'll never know
Hark the Ninja Turtles sing
Thriving thanks to your offspring

Hark the New Kids On The Block
Making millions 'round the clock
Ten year olds they hypnotize
Into needing merchandise

Time that should be spent on telling
Christmas truths instead of selling
Muppet Babies, Kid 'n Play
Barbie for the holiday
"Hark," commercialism sings
"Watch our programs and buy our things."'




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