The Hymns and Carols of Christmas

A Prisoner's Christmas

Fred Silva

To The Tune Of God Rest You Merry, Gentlemen

I thought I shot a burglar one snowy Christmas day
and I was fully justified, no matter what folks say
I heard loud footsteps on my roof just past the stroke of one,

So I got up and went straight for my gun -
My old M1
I just got right up and went straight for my gun.

I ran outside in spite of my fear,to see who it might be
perhaps it was a cruel joke some prankster played on me
When suddenly I heard a deep voice shouting YO ! YO ! YO !

So I took quick aim and let the hammer go,
Repeatedly so,
I just took quick aim and let the hammer go

The neighbors heard the fatal blasts and speed dialed 911
It took all of two hours for the county cops to come
They were quite shocked to see the mess my front lawn had become

There was not much left of that poor fat ole' bum
He shoulda' run
There was not much left of that poor fat ole' bum

The neighbors kids were shouting something I could not quite hear
something about a big red sleigh and eight tiny reindeer
The cops stared at me coldly and said "MAN YOU MAKE ME SICK"

And arrested me for murdering Saint Nick
Ain't that a kick
That fat bum I blew away was old Saint Nick

 

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